Thursday, March 29, 2012

Day 1 after summer 2011, coming back to Berlin

As I come out from the airplane the smile comes to my face.
The air is heavier than in Finland, it's warm and full.
At the S-Bahn station Beusselstrasse I’m flirting with a cute guy and he walks past me and smiles. He takes the S41-train. I take the 42 to the other direction.
Home is still here, but no one is home. My room feels like no one lived there, the spirit is gone.
I clean a bit and get a culture shock about the dirt in the kitchen. I clean more.
I sleep.
I clean more and I throw away my pillows.
When I try to sleep the sun comes in and wakes me up. 
I eat together with a girl staying at our place and then Sabine comes and we talk.
We bike to Prenzlauer Berg and go for tea and then to the contact jam. 
I meet many of my friends there, I feel disconnected. My soul is still travelling somewhere in the air, or it's still in Helsinki. It’s going to take time.
I come home through the dark city, it’s more quiet than I remembered. 

(nyt kuulostaa ihan unelta)

it is the hot, it is the poem

I don't write poems, 
i write how the weather is, or questions,
How it rains today or doesn't.

It's me and me, it's the emptiness around. The poem.

It's me pushing away the lover when it gets too hot and sweaty under the blankets made of feathers. 

The poem is the silence and space around, that i need, that is mine, 
that is around me. And it is the sweat, it is the hot. 

Miteinander - i like this word - ich mag dieses Wort, ich mag es sehr.






Tuesday, March 20, 2012

suunnittelematta sunnuntai

Onko oikeasti, onko
mahdollista olla rehellinen
ihan arkisesti,
onko mahdollista onko onko,
olla suunnittelematta tunteitaan,
minun ja sinun ja minun.

Onko mahdollista olla
arkinen ihan rehellisesti
ja erikoisen rehellinen
kokoajan arjessa
ja suunnitella sunnuntaita
vasta kun se on siinä, tässä, sohvalla, pyörien pyörien alla,
ihossa, lihassa, tuulessa.

Sunnuntai tulee sohvalle,
istuu alas ja odottaa.